The Edit Menu has never had a self esteem problem. It is self-assured almost to the point of cockiness, and it loves attention. It is charming, to be sure, but can easily get arried away with its own brash dreams, and if you are not careful, it can convince you to invest everything in its schemes, for in its own way, it is sincere, it believes what it says, and what is more compelling than sincerity?
The Tools Menu is by far the most attractive of the menus with its sunny disposition and lithe ankles, but it is an elusive menu as well. To try to tame the tools menu is to lose it. If one wants a tools menu in one's life, one must simply let it exist, coming and going as it pleases, like the wind, and like the wind, to try to grasp it and hold it down and set it on a responsible schedule will surely result in capturing nothing at all.
The Recorder Menu seems to always be going through "one of those phases." First it has given its life over to Christ, then it has found the kernal of truth at the center of existance employing the "judicious use of sacred psychedelic drugs" then one can't even hold a decent conversation with it because it is so involved in its own solopsism it can't grasp the concrete existance of any entity other than itself, then it wants to go off and start a band that will change the history of rock-and-roll forever. Best to just indulge it in its whimsies and be sure that it gets enough to eat whenever it comes home.
The Group Menu is delightful when it works out for all of the parties involved, but it is an unfortunately rare occurance where some unhappy dynamic does not rear it's head. It is difficult to share a group menu equally, and it seems that some member always dominates the scene, some other member feels slighted or feels it is contributing more than its share, and other members get caught in the middle trying, ineffectually, to make peace. It's a dangerous menu indeed when one or more members are not perfectly at ease with the others. I'm sure I don't have to remind you of the Graphic Set fracas of 1992.
The Properties Menu has a winsome face with wide blue eyes, and it looks sweet in organdy, but don't let it fool you into believing it any less the competant mechanic, and talented artist than it truly is. When one first considers its difficult upbringing and how it had to work swing-shift in the local cheese factory trouble shooting the fermentation tank system just to survive and save money to buy art supplies, and then examines its valuable contribution to the post-modern movement with such works as "Thickness" and "Layer," one can really grasp the perfection that is human potential. The achievements of the Properties Menu virtually move this tech-writer to tears of rapture. The rumours going around town tying it to the Scientology movement are spurious, and should be given no creedence.
No Santa marries Himself, Dr.!
